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Testimony

God put it on my heart to give my testimony in chapel to the students at school. I thought I would post it here. I haven't made any changes, so it might be confusing at some points, but remember that I graduated from the school at which I now teach, and that I was speaking to high school students.

Dear Lord, I pray that you open ears and hearts. Speak into each and every student here today. I pray that you would show each person here today your love.

God never meant for us to learn by experience. He meant for us to learn by faith. We are supposed to hear a word from him, and believe and trust in Him that it is true. Take for instance the original sin. God told Adam & Eve not to eat the fruit. He wanted them to trust Him. But they had to learn from experience, and it had some pretty dire consequences. Here’s an example from our time. When your parents tell you to not run out into the middle of the street, they want you to learn through faith—believing what they tell you—inste…

Lies From the Devil We Have to Stop Telling our Daughters

For some time now, I have been asking the Lord about some roots that have taken place in my life. I've been trying to figure out why I behave in certain ways, and why I think the way I think. Some of those roots are quite unhealthy, namely my not-so-stellar track record in the dating/relationship department. All of the men I have been in serious relationships with have had one thing in common. They would tell me they loved me, cared about me, didn't want to hurt me, etc., but then they would act in ways that were definitely not loving, and sometimes not even kind. I stuck around in each relationship far beyond what any emotionally healthy person would or should. I would get hurt by their actions, confront them, then they would apologize, profess their love, and we would make up. I believed their words, and I refused to believe their actions. Obviously, I was the common denominator in these relationships, but in the two years since my divorce, I've been searching for the r…

Preparing You for the Path

One of my favorite parenting and teaching questions is, "Are you preparing your child for the path, or are you preparing the path for your child?" When I first heard this question, I envisioned this path through a thick jungle that is full of rocks, tree branches, and tree trunks fallen over onto the dirt path. As it winds through the dense mass of trees and vines, I see parents stopping their children every few steps and picking up a boulder and tossing off the path for their child. Or maybe the parent has a machete in their hand, and the parent quickly cuts the branches away from the path, so that when the child walks the path, it is free and clear of any obstacle.

Will this create a happy child? Most definitely. A child with a cleared path can frolic and play to his heart's content along that path. However, he will also grow up with the belief that the path should always be cleared for him. He will believe that life is easy, and that it isn't his responsibility to…

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Those Words

“This just isn’t going to work out.” The dreaded words. The end. It's over. In my years of dating experience, I’ve heard Those Words several times. I’ve also said Those Words a time or two. Whatever partner is on the receiving end of Those Words is undoubtedly disappointed, hurt and saddened, but it’s a harsh reality that many relationships don’t always work out.

The majority of dating relationships end prior to walking down the aisle. But once you say, "I do," you never expect to hear Those Words ever again. But too often, it happens anyway. Families are devastated, hearts are shattered, and covenants are broken.
When you realize a dating relationship isn’t working for you, that’s when you utter Those Words or some variation of them. The thing is, though, after you say “I do,” you no longer get to say Those Words when the going gets tough--even if you feel the relationship isn't working. Every relationship has its ups and downs, marriage more than any other. That’…

Because of Who I Am

Someone posted on Facebook the other day the following:
Why would you fight for someone who clearly doesn't want you? Please let them go. You are valuable, just not to them. I thought about it for a minute, because I indeed fought for my husband when he clearly didn't want me. I fought for our marriage, even when he had zero interest in making our marriage work. He had already checked out and told me point-blank that he just didn't want to work on our marriage, but yet I fought on my knees before the Lord.

Throughout the first few months of our separation, I prayed day-in and day-out. I beseeched the Lord to intercede. I rebuked Satan, and I prostrated myself before the Lord God Almighty. I went to therapy, and I watched sermons online. I listened to every Jimmy Evans podcast I could find. I journaled and devoured God's Word. I wrote my husband scriptures and prayers daily. I soon filled a 100-page journal front and back.

Shortly after he left in June, God told me tha…

Covert Red Flags: The Real Things You Should Be Looking Out For in Relationships

Your relationship with your spouse should be the closest human relationship you ever have. As we are dating, we are assessing whether or not that person could potentially fit into our inner circle. This causes us to be on high alert for red flags. Most red flags are obvious--lack of communication, anger issues, irresponsibility, controlling behavior, abuse, etc. A quick Google search will bring up list upon list of red flags we should look out for. Being rude to waitstaff, not making your relationship public, not caring about XYZ, stone walling, gaslighting, and more can all be found on most lists.

But what about the covert red flags? Those things that are less obvious. My first marriage taught me to look out for the overt red flags like the ones found in every advice column. My second marriage taught me to look out for covert red flags, ones that I never even realized were red flags until I could look back. The entire time we dated, I kept looking for the overt red flags, and there …