“I don’t know how to do this,” a student tells me. “Did you read the directions?” I ask. Inevitably, I get either a shrug of the shoulders or a, “It’s confusing.” “Let’s read the directions, then,” I say. Then I walk the student through the directions, and suddenly, they know how to do it.  Or, after an assignment is given, a student will sit there and do nothing. When I ask him or her why they aren’t working, “I don’t know what to do” is the reply more times than not. Many times, after the due date of an assignment, students will tell me they didn’t do it because they didn’t know what to do or how to do it. I’ve gotten so many e-mails from parents telling me their kid don’t know how to do this or that. Let’s be clear here: the directions are written plainly on the assignment. Every project has step-by-step instructions, and I go over all requirements in class. It’s not a matter of “not knowing” how to do something—it’s a matter of learned helplessness, and it’s qu...

“Trust the science.” We hear this phrase often, especially in the wake of Covid. However, it's usually framed as though science and faith are opposites—as though believing in God somehow requires abandoning intelligence, reason, evidence, or critical thinking. Christians are often portrayed as people who reject science, while people who “follow science” are portrayed as enlightened and rational. But the reality is much more nuanced than that, because at the end of the day, everyone has faith in something . Follow me with this thought experiment: How do you know Antarctica exists? Only .005% of people have been to Antarctica, so it's safe to say that if you're reading this, you haven't been there. You have never physically stood on its ice, touched its snow, or independently verified its existence with your own eyes. You believe Antarctica exists because you trust the testimony of people who have been there. You trust photographs, maps, documentaries, satellite images, t...

“I’ve asked you three times now to be quiet. If you continue to talk, I will write a referral to the office,” I said to a student today. “But I was just trying to ask him a question,” the student responded. “It doesn’t matter. I asked you to be quiet, and I told you the consequence if you talk again,” I said. “But I’m…” she trailed off muttering something under her breath. I’ve had conversations similar to this with more students than I could count—even with my own children. The need to get the last word in is overwhelming for some of these students. The longer I’ve been in education, the more of an issue it has become. These are what I call “Yes, ma’am moments.” They are times when I give a correction, and all I need is a “Yes, ma’am.” I do not need an explanation; I do not need you to plead your case. I do not need you to talk back. I simply need you to recognize that a correction needs to be made and then correct the behavior. That’s it. The more I watch my students...

I’ve traveled to Guatemala, Belize, and Mexico on three separate mission trips. On each of these trips, I had deep, emotional, and intimate encounters with God. While I was on my trip to Belize, God showed me how being pulled away from distraction, from routine, from technology, and from responsibilities allowed me to hear from my Heavenly Father clearly and grow closer to Him. One morning in Belize, I woke up early and walked to the beach before sunrise. I sat on a nearby dock and watched the waves lap at the beach. At the water’s edge , God spoke to me so strongly, and so clearly. Since those mission trips, I’ve noticed that when I need to talk to God, when I need answers, when I need to feel His intimacy, I have to get away. I have to find a place that’s quiet and away from the distractions of everyday life. When we look at scripture, we see this theme repeated. In Exodus, we see Moses spend forty years in the wilderness before God spoke to him through a burning bush. God ...

Complaining is one of my biggest pet peeves. As a high school English teacher, I hear teenagers complain every day about everything. They complain about the rules, the expectations, the assignments. They complain about each other, about their teachers, about their parents. We talk in my class often about not complaining, because when we complain, our focus is on what is uncomfortable, missing, unfair, or frustrating, when our focus should be on the things we do have and the opportunities before us. Sometimes we need to shift our focus from complaining to gratitude. Our words—whether grumbling or gratitude—shape the way we see the world around us. People who constantly complain eventually begin viewing everything negatively. Every inconvenience becomes a problem; every correction feels unfair; every responsibility feels overwhelming, and every difficulty becomes evidence that life is against them. Complaining changes perspective. When our minds become consumed with what is frust...

Throughout my adolescence, I got in trouble for things that others did not. If there were several students talking in class, I was the one called out for it. If a group of us were tardy, I was the one to get detention. I watched others cheat on tests, and the one time I tried, I got caught. If I talked back, I was immediately in trouble, while I watched other students get away with far worse behavior. This pattern of seemingly always getting in trouble for things that others didn’t followed me into adulthood. I would watch other coaches yell at their athletes, but if I so much as raised my voice an ounce, a parent e-mail was sure to be waiting for me in my inbox. I have watched other teachers break all kinds of rules, but if I so much as think about breaking a rule, I’d be admonished. It has affected me in a way where I am careful to watch myself—my tone, my words, my actions. As I’ve raised my two daughters, they have gone through the same thing I did—they continually were he...

Boundaries. It's one of the most recent pop-culture therapy buzzwords. Everywhere I turn, I see people setting "boundaries" on their relationships and friendships, but more often than not, these boundaries aren't boundaries—they are veiled attempts at control. Boundaries define what you are going to do in a relationship. A boundary says, "This is the line where my responsibility stops and yours begins." For example, if a friend keeps snapping me with a rubber band, a boundary says, "If you snap me with a rubber band, then I will leave the room and no longer sit next to you." Notice how the language is about what I am going to do—not what the other person needs to do. "You're not allowed to have friends who are girls," I've heard a girl say to her boyfriend. "That's just a boundary I have." Except that's not a boundary, that's control. Here are some more examples:  Control: “You cannot go out...

I had to confiscate a phone today. In Texas, there is a new law that says students are not allowed to have their phones at all during the school day. If they are, we as teachers are required to take the phone and turn it in to the office. A girl in my 5th period was on her phone, so I had to take it. After class, she begged me not to turn it in. She knows the rules; she knows what I'm required to do, and she knows I’m not going to change my mind. But she kept asking—over and over again—for me not to turn it in. After telling her repeatedly that my hands were tied, I finally had to tell her to stop asking—I wasn't going to break the law for her. I was initially upset with the expectation of mercy —the idea that she thought she shouldn’t have to suffer any consequences for breaking a law, and she wanted me to be the one who gave her that mercy. Then I started thinking about how so many of my students beg for mercy—for their grades, for me to not take late points off, to...

“You didn’t write this—you copied this from another student,” I told one of my 10th grade English students. He emphatically denied it. I showed him the other student’s paper. I read them both, side by side. He still denied it. The truth  was sitting right in front of his face, and he still held on to the idea that he didn’t cheat. Unfortunately, I’ve had this same type of conversation with numerous students. Now that AI has made it so easy for students to cheat, these conversations happen more and more often. What baffles me is not just the lack of academic integrity, but the lying in the aftermath of getting caught. These students hold on to their lie, and they refuse to take accountability. And the more I’ve thought about it, the more I’ve realized that this isn’t just a student problem—it’s a human problem. Identity Sometimes, refusal to take accountability in the face of truth has to do with our skewed view of ourselves. If your identity is rooted in something othe...

It’s a simple question, but the answer is surprisingly...we don't know. Obadiah was a minor prophet in the Old Testament, and he wrote a book that is only one chapter with 21 verses. We don’t know his background; we don’t know where he came from. We don’t know his family, his occupation, or even exactly when he lived. His name means “servant of the Lord,” and beyond that, Scripture gives us very little. And yet, his message is anything but small, which is ironic. A man we know virtually nothing about was chosen to deliver a message about pride. A man whose identity fades into the background is the one God uses to confront a nation that had made everything about themselves. Edom was a nation defined by pride. They believed they were secure, untouchable, elevated above everyone else. When Israel was attacked and in distress, Edom didn’t step in to help. They stood back and watched. They even joined in the attack by looting the Israelites and blocking their escape routes (1...

I first read the novel Redeeming Love years ago, and like so many people, the story drew me in immediately. It's emotional, compelling, and deeply moving. It's the story of a man who refuses to give up on the woman he loves, no matter how many times she walks away. It’s a story that stays with you, and for many readers, it reshapes the way they think about love. But over the years, I’ve noticed something about how people often apply this story. People don’t just see it as a powerful illustration of God’s love—they begin to see it as a model for their own relationships. The takeaway shifts from “this is how God loves us” to “this is how I should love someone else.” And that is where things start to go wrong. The book—and eventually a movie—is based on the story of Hosea. God commands Hosea to marry Gomer, a prostitute who is unfaithful to him. Over and over again, she leaves. Over and over again, God tells Hosea to go after her. It's uncomfortable, and it's p...

I was adopted at the age of 5 weeks old, and about two years ago, I found my biological mother. What I thought would bring clarity and closure instead brought complexity, confusion, and a relationship that has been anything but easy to navigate. It has stretched me in ways I didn’t expect, and at times, it has left me questioning what God was doing in allowing this door to open in the first place. But as time has passed, I’ve begun to see something I couldn’t see at the beginning. God doesn’t always reveal His purposes in the moment. In fact, most of the time, He doesn’t. We walk through situations thinking we understand what we’re stepping into, only to realize later that what we thought was the point...wasn’t the point at all. I thought finding my biological mother would be about her, but it wasn’t. It was about my mom. It was about God showing me—in a way I had never seen so clearly before—that He had been orchestrating every detail of my life long before I ever und...

Last week, I caught a student cheating on a project. His girlfriend had completed the project for him, and he turned it in with his name on it. When I confronted him, he refused to admit it, even though I had his handwriting sample and the girl’s handwriting sample. She had even used the same pen on both assignments. What stood out to me wasn’t so much the cheating, but rather his response. Instead of taking accountability, he had the audacity to be offended that I would accuse him of cheating. That reaction is what got me thinking. It wasn’t that he didn’t understand what he had done. It wasn’t that there was a misunderstanding or a lack of evidence. The truth was clear. But instead of accepting it, he rejected it. More than that—he was offended by it. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized how often we do the exact same thing. A few years ago, I wrote about taking offense —about how often we assume something is directed at us when it really isn’t. Most of the...

We hear the phrase “facts over feelings” often, usually in arguments or debates, but Scripture presents that idea in a much deeper and more personal way. Feelings are real. They are not something to ignore or dismiss. But they are not always reliable, and they are never meant to be the foundation of truth. When Jesus was on the cross, He cried out, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” in Matthew 27:46. In that moment, Jesus was expressing something very real. He felt the weight of separation, the depth of suffering, and the anguish of what He was enduring. But what is often overlooked is that Jesus was not just speaking from emotion—He was quoting Scripture. Those words come directly from Psalm 22:1. Psalm 22 begins with despair, but it does not end there. It moves from anguish to trust, from suffering to victory. Even in the middle of His pain, Jesus anchored Himself in truth. His feelings were real, but they were not the full picture. And that is where we often s...

My favorite short story is The Scarlet Ibis. It's a story about Doodle, a little boy who was born with severe disabilities, and he defies the odds to learn to walk, talk, run and almost become a normal boy, just like his brother always wished he would be. The story is told from the brother's point of view, and as he thinks back about Doodle, he says, "I did not know then that pride is a wonderful, terrible thing, a seed that grows two vines, life and death."  When I teach this short story in my English class, we talk about how pride can be a great thing when you have accomplished something you've worked hard at. When pride gives you motivation to become a better version of yourself, it gives you life. However, pride can be destructive when it breeds arrogance and selfishness. When pride causes you to damage those whom you love, it brings you death. What stands out to me more and more each time I teach this story is not just that pride can destroy, bu...

I absolutely love my backyard. It’s large, with mature trees and a covered deck with Edison lights hanging from the crossbars. There are hammock chairs to relax and kick your feet back, and a fire pit to roast s’mores. We put in an above-ground pool, with tiki torches surrounding it. There’s also a gravel walkway lined with solar lights leading to a garden along the back fence. There are multiple flower beds, with amaryllis, lilies, and sunflowers. It’s truly an oasis in the hot Texas summers. Inevitably though, every spring, I have to fight the weeds. Even though there is a weed barrier under the gravel walkway, weeds still pop up all along the pathway and in the cracks of the porch. I have to spray them and pull them every spring. Last week, I went out to the backyard to start pulling the weeds. However, some of the plants growing in the walkway didn’t look like weeds. I used Google Lens, and it told me that these plants were sunflowers. About 10 plants, not yet budded—jus...

My absolute favorite thing about teaching high school students is when I get to have real, genuine conversations with my students. Today, my students took their state exams, so at the end of the day, I put on a movie, and I let the kids talk, hang out, and relax a little.  A boy who sits near my desk was finishing some of his late work, and I overheard him talking to another boy about this girl he's been talking to. After a particularly funny comment one of them made, I looked over at them with wide eyes and asked if he had gotten in trouble with his mom for what he said. One thing led to another, and we started talking about relationships.  This boy conveyed that he didn't want to put his all into a relationship with this girl, because he was afraid if he put his everything in, what if she broke his heart? A wise thought from a 16-year-old boy.  It got me thinking about relationships, brokenness, and how important it is to put God at the center of every relation...

  On November 30, 2022, seven-year-old Athena Strand was at home in Paradise, Texas, when a FedEx contract delivery driver arrived with a package—Christmas presents Athena’s step-mom had ordered. What should have been an ordinary moment—a package delivery—turned into something unimaginable. Tanner Horner, the FedEx driver, kidnapped Athena and later murdered her, taking the life of a child who should have been safe at her own home. After years of court battles, Horner stood in court today and pled guilty to the charges. The reality of what happened to Athena has once again come to the surface, which forces us to confront something we often try to avoid: the presence of real, undeniable evil in the world. There is no way to soften what happened, and there really is no reason to try to understand. Maybe it's because it happened so close to home, or maybe it's because I've known the Strand family my whole life. Maybe it's because I'm the mom of two girls, o...