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Showing posts from January, 2018

Fleeting Feelings

In our postmodernist society, we are inundated with media that tells us, "If it feels good, do it." We are told to indulge in whatever vices we desire--sex, drugs, alcohol, gluttony, whatever it may be. What's right for you may not be right for me. The only caveat we are given is to do no harm to others. Postmodernists believe that definite terms, boundaries, and absolute truth do not exist. They believe that truth is relative and truth is up to each individual to determine for him or herself. Therefore, postmodernists believe that no one has the authority to define truth or impose upon others his or her idea of moral right and wrong. Their self-rationalization of society and life then, becomes a moral relativism versus divine revelation. There can be no latter if there is only the former. This pervasive, persuasive, and perverse thinking can be seen in our movies, TV shows, news media, education system, government, and even our children.

This kind of relative morality …

Put in the Work

Several years ago, after my divorce, God promised me a home (as in one I could purchase for myself and my girls). So I started working my butt off to save money; I drove the bus whenever I could, and I started coaching to earn extra cash. We scrimped and saved. I did massive amounts of credit repair. Then I had to go house hunting. I had to write a $1,000 earnest money check. I had to put in a mortgage application. I had to sign the documents. I had to go get a really big cashier's check with all the money I had in the entire world. And in August, I bought my first new home as a single mom. God was the only way it could happen.

With this being said, God made me a promise of a home. But I had to do the work on myself first, then I had to actually put myself out there and go through the process of purchasing the home. God was with me every step of the way, guiding me, teaching me and showing me what to do. But He did not just drop a house in my lap. I didn't just keep praying m…

Satan's Attacks

Growing up, the adults in my life would tell me that I was a leader. Being young and naïve, I would try to be a leader--I ran for class office, I tried to step up into other leadership roles at school, and I never won. Not once. My senior year, I was captain of the basketball team, but that was mainly because I was the best one on the team--not because of stellar leadership skills. I left high school thinking that the adults in my life were severely misled about my abilities, and that I was most definitely not a leader. So that's how I led my life--that is until a couple years ago.

One of the singles pastors at church decided that I needed to lead a group. Obviously, I did not concur, but I bit the bullet and did it anyway. After that season, I was asked again to be a leader, then again. In May 2016, I got a call from my singles pastor. She asked me to lead the Single Parent Family Mission Trip to Mexico. I had not even really planned on going on that trip. I had been praying abo…

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Those Words

“This just isn’t going to work out.” The dreaded words. The end. It's over. In my years of dating experience, I’ve heard Those Words several times. I’ve also said Those Words a time or two. Whatever partner is on the receiving end of Those Words is undoubtedly disappointed, hurt and saddened, but it’s a harsh reality that many relationships don’t always work out.

The majority of dating relationships end prior to walking down the aisle. But once you say, "I do," you never expect to hear Those Words ever again. But too often, it happens anyway. Families are devastated, hearts are shattered, and covenants are broken.
When you realize a dating relationship isn’t working for you, that’s when you utter Those Words or some variation of them. The thing is, though, after you say “I do,” you no longer get to say Those Words when the going gets tough--even if you feel the relationship isn't working. Every relationship has its ups and downs, marriage more than any other. That’…

Because of Who I Am

Someone posted on Facebook the other day the following:
Why would you fight for someone who clearly doesn't want you? Please let them go. You are valuable, just not to them. I thought about it for a minute, because I indeed fought for my husband when he clearly didn't want me. I fought for our marriage, even when he had zero interest in making our marriage work. He had already checked out and told me point-blank that he just didn't want to work on our marriage, but yet I fought on my knees before the Lord.

Throughout the first few months of our separation, I prayed day-in and day-out. I beseeched the Lord to intercede. I rebuked Satan, and I prostrated myself before the Lord God Almighty. I went to therapy, and I watched sermons online. I listened to every Jimmy Evans podcast I could find. I journaled and devoured God's Word. I wrote my husband scriptures and prayers daily. I soon filled a 100-page journal front and back.

Shortly after he left in June, God told me tha…

Covert Red Flags: The Real Things You Should Be Looking Out For in Relationships

Your relationship with your spouse should be the closest human relationship you ever have. As we are dating, we are assessing whether or not that person could potentially fit into our inner circle. This causes us to be on high alert for red flags. Most red flags are obvious--lack of communication, anger issues, irresponsibility, controlling behavior, abuse, etc. A quick Google search will bring up list upon list of red flags we should look out for. Being rude to waitstaff, not making your relationship public, not caring about XYZ, stone walling, gaslighting, and more can all be found on most lists.

But what about the covert red flags? Those things that are less obvious. My first marriage taught me to look out for the overt red flags like the ones found in every advice column. My second marriage taught me to look out for covert red flags, ones that I never even realized were red flags until I could look back. The entire time we dated, I kept looking for the overt red flags, and there …